Paradise is humid, jungly, and very bitey. I’m not trying to be that cool—even at it’s hottest it’s really no worse here than an August day in St. Louis, or D.C. or NY even, I’m just trying to be dry.

Bugless in Phoenix

I loved living in Arizona for one simple reason: the air is so dry that the bug life packs up and heads for wetter pastures. No standing water, no hatcheries, no whining clouds of mosquitoes. Bliss.

Back in Missouri, summer evenings could be a blood drive with no cookies. Tampa? The no-see-ums (sand fleas) were invisible little assassins. In Vietnam, the mosquitoes were relentless—go ahead and laugh, but anyone who’s been there knows. I’ve even fished northern Minnesota where the skeeters formed an eclipse—you could lose the sun and still get bit through your blue jeans.

And now I’m in the Philippines—surrounded by jungle and loving my life. But with paradise comes trade-offs. Humidity here isn’t a weather pattern; it’s a lifestyle. Filipinos shrug and keep moving. Me? I don’t need “cool” as much as I need “dry.” Dry socks. Dry shirt. Dry back. Dry everything. Bugs are part of the deal, and if you live here, you will get bit. That’s not whining—that’s weather.

So yes…
Come to the Philippines, where DEET is a treat.
Not a complaint. Not a warning. Just the truth with a wink. Bring your sense of humor, a fan, a towel, and something that confuses the local mosquito union. You’ll still love the sunsets, the smiles, and the easy pace of life. Just understand that “tropical” doesn’t mean “postcard.” It means lush, alive, and hungry—for your ankles.

I’ll take it. Every time. I’d rather wring out a shirt in paradise than wear a sweater in a cubicle farm. Out here, the trade is simple: jungle vibes and ocean air in exchange for a little itching and a lot of laundry. Deal accepted.

Quick field notes (from a happily bitten expat)

• Sweat is normal. So is a backup shirt.
• Fans are freedom. Airflow beats “cool” nine days out of ten.
• DEET, citronella, or your favorite potion—pick your poison and reapply.
• If you barbecue, the guests will come; so will the bugs. Plan accordingly.
• And if you forget all this? The jungle will remind you.

Semper Fi from the tropics.