When I first came to the Philippines, I didn’t have the benefit of multiple YouTube videos about everything—from the cost of living, to the weather, to the price of rice in China. I came here cold. And yes, I made mistakes. Some of them were very costly.
But I didn’t give up—because I knew this was a place I could be happy if I just played the game a little smarter.
The Philippines is not the U.S. and never will be. But it can be paradise—if you make the right choices. Today, you’ve got resources I never had back in 2010. You can watch videos, read blogs, and research every angle of life here before you ever step on a plane. Use them. Learn first. Decide wisely.
I may have had to come in cold in 2010, but in 2025 you don’t have to.
That’s why I’m not fleeing the Philippines.
I moved to a place that’s unique—even for the Philippines. It’s safe. It’s quiet. I get fresh air, no nonstop karaoke, killer ocean views, white beaches to stroll, clear water to snorkel in, no rooster wars under my window. I’m secure, well fed, and I’ve got the amenities I expect from the U.S.—air con, a swimming pool, solid internet, hot water, real groceries, good friends and healthcare. I didn’t come here to rough it; I came here to live well. You don’t have to suffer the jeepney fumes and snarled traffic of Manila or Cebu City, there are plenty of wonderful small Barangays where you can live peacefully and when you go out you can stroll the streets without being cut down by a stray taxi.
And yes—there are plenty of lovely ladies who actually care for an old Marine like me. That counts in this season of life. My ladies just happen to be trained in elder care. Why do you think Filipinas make the best nurses? It’s because they really care about you that’s why.
Now, about those guys who didn’t stick it out…
Most of the bailouts came for the wrong reasons. Young enough to chase a pretty Filipina, too broke to support her—or themselves. No pension, no retirement income, no safety net. Their “plan” was wishful thinking and bad advice. They complain when the $ conversion drops a peso or two like it’s the end of the world. The sky is falling! My advice, be patient, come here when you have a pension from social security, military disability or private pension or savings. So what if you are older and a young round eye in the states wont give you the time of day unless you drive a Ferrari. Age gap means nothing here and Filipinas prefer an older mature man. They know not to trust a young filipino man who is here today and gone tomorrow.
And bad advice is everywhere: “Don’t worry, just be a blogger! Start a YouTube channel—money will roll in!” Yeah, right. We’ve already covered how hard it is to make real money online while living here. Without a serious plan, that’s like building a nipa hut out of balsa wood in a typhoon path.
Then there are the business dreamers. Don’t think for one minute you can come here and start an American-style restaurant, an internet café, or some “can’t-miss” venture. The law won’t let you own it outright. Put it in a Filipino partner’s name and, when money shows up, loyalty often disappears. Seen it too many times: the foreigner gets pushed aside and left with nothing.
Romance? Here’s the part no one tells you: when you get the girl, you get the family. That’s how it works. With girls… you get eggroll. Have the funds to support more than just her, because family comes first here. If that shocks you, you didn’t do your homework. And if you treat them right they will bend over backwards to see you live life to the fullest and come to no harm.
And those “I got scammed by a Filipina” sob stories? Nine times out of ten, lust drove the train and the “little brain” was at the controls. Relationships here aren’t magically different from the U.S.—you still have to know your partner before you commit. Jump in blind because she’s young and pretty, and when it blows up… that’s not a scam; that’s a bad choice. Pretty girls here have little resources than a killer body and they are forced to use it to help their families or to support kids they had out of love only to find their weak partner not ready for the responsibilities of fatherhood. One lady I know who is the oldest of nine kids (it’s a Catholic country) tells me horror stories of how the father left them all for a younger woman and the owner of the home they were in repossessed the roof for lack of payment. You think for one minute this kind of thing is forgotten, to them this justifies anything they can do to get money for their family, including “scamming” foreigners.
If you want to know what Filipina’s really think go no further than the most trusted source of views from the Filipina side, The Filipina Pea, I urge you to watch her videos and subscribe to her channel. Here is a sample of her no bullshit advice for the foreigner. And what’s so refreshing about her videos is the lack of the clickbait you see on most videos posted by expats about living here. She just doesn’t need to dress hers up with AI generated garbage to sell her message:
Here’s another gem for the insecure: if hearing Tagalog (or Cebuano, Ilocano, etc.) around you makes you think people are talking about you, you’re going to be miserable. Most of the time they’re chatting about lunch, kids, or neighbor gossip. If that rattles you, you didn’t prepare.
And social media jealousy? Filipinas live on Facebook and Messenger. It’s family, friends, group chats—the daily heartbeat. If seeing your lady glued to her phone makes you spiral, you are in deep trouble. That’s not a bug in the culture; it’s a feature. Accept it or don’t come.
I showed you the real deal with the Filipina Pea. Now against my better judgment here is the flip side. A real duche bag troll who calls himself sick grandpa. There are no redeeming qualities to what he puts on YouTube and any advice he gives should be ignored.
It all circles back to one thing: do your homework.
- Do your homework about where you’ll live.
- Do your homework about money (pension, savings, income from back home).
- Do your homework about law & business (you won’t legally work or own the thing you think you will).
- Do your homework about your partner (and her family).
- Do your homework about culture (language, phones, family obligations)
- Think twice about driving anything here, even a motorcycle. If you hit someone or even if they hit you, guess who pays? For the price of a car you can get a lot of trike or tuk tuk rides.
- Don’t fear the Reaper – the Philippines is not the dangerous place the uninformed would have you believe. Behave yourself and you will be fine, and travel no further south than Davao on Mindinao.
- Don’t panic at the first sign of chest pains or a cold, they have the best doctors in the world here AND healthcare costs only a fraction of what a doctors visit or a hospital stay in the US will cost you.
- Pay attention to the visa requirements here. You can get by on a tourist visa for a couple of years of extending by a month or two at a time and if you plan to live here permanently the best deal for that is for veterans, the SRRV.
- Speaking of Veterans, there is an VA outpatient clinic in Manila where you can schedule video calls with questions about benefits or you can make an in person visit with an appointment but you don’t get the same healthcare here as in the US. You can only be treated for service connected disabilities such as mental health for PTSD. A 100% rating with unemployability means nothing here. As far as being re-imbursed for medical expenses you incur, you can try submitting receipts to the VA and see what happens. Healthcare is so cheap here I don’t even bother.
- Don’t sweat the “skin tax” the difference between what a Filipino would pay for goods or services and the extra $ of what they would charge a “rich” foreigner. Don’t be a cheap charlie and cross the street to save a couple of pesos.
- About dating sites such as the Filipina Cupid, my advice is don’t go there. There are plenty of ladies to meet once you get here, enough said.
Ignore real advice and only listen to what you want to hear, and you’ll be the next guy uploading a “Why I Fled the Philippines” video.
Me? I burned the ship. I committed. That’s why I’m still here—happy, secure, and living the life I chose.