Hurry Up and Wait

Stand By to Stand By: The Fine Art of Sleeping at Attention

In the Marine Corps, “Stand by to stand by” isn’t just a phrase — it’s a lifestyle. We learned to master the art of sleeping while standing, nodding off mid-hurry-up-and-wait, and running full speed into the next delay. Orders came down like weather reports: maybe accurate, maybe not, but you’d better act like they were gospel.

There we were, loading up… then standing down. Ready to roll, until we weren’t. Everything was urgent until it suddenly wasn’t. You could sprint to a position, fully geared, fueled by adrenaline — only to wait another two hours for someone to find the key to the truck.

We called it what it was: a professional sport of hurry up and wait.

At least it taught patience. And how to nap like a ninja in boots.

But here’s the punchline: I got out of the Corps, and the civilian world said, “Welcome home, Marine — now take a number.” Because stand by to stand by didn’t die. It just got a new uniform: khakis, flip-flops, and a customer-service smile that says “We’ll be with you shortly” while your soul quietly evaporates.

If you want the opposite of America’s Line Nation, here’s my favorite example of how the Philippines does everyday life differently: Filipinos and their sandals (tsinelas).

Some of my favorite places you’re forced to wait:

• Cruise ship boarding — You’re funneled into rope lanes like cattle, clutching documents you’ve already shown twice. Then you watch someone in front of you pick that exact moment to reorganize bags, hunt passports, and hold a family meeting about sunscreen. “Have your documents ready!” they yell — at people who look genuinely surprised that travel requires documents. (If you missed my earlier cruise rant, here it is: Cruise ship chaos.)
• ATM lines — One person steps up like they’re launching Apollo 11. They do a transaction. Then another. Then another. Then they pull out a friend’s card. Then a cousin’s. By the time they’re done, you’ve witnessed a small-scale banking operation and you’re pretty sure you’ve aged a fiscal quarter.
• The Walmart return line (or any big-box returns counter) — This is where time goes to die. Somebody is returning an item that’s clearly survived multiple wars, and they’re litigating it like it’s a Supreme Court case. Meanwhile you’re holding one simple return, watching the person ahead unload a cart of mystery items like they’re filing taxes in person.

And it’s not just those. Airport security, hold music, drive-thrus where someone studies the menu like it’s a sacred text — the whole country runs on “stand by,” we just don’t call it that anymore.

Waiting is bad. Waiting while the system is down is worse — which reminds me of this one: Blackout culture: U.S. vs Philippines.

In the Corps, at least the waiting came with a mission. In civilian life, half the time it comes with a receipt, a rope barrier, and somebody saying “System’s down.” Either way… stand by to stand by. Semper in line.