social-dynamics

Gossip Is Social Candy

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It tastes good in the moment. It rots your reputation over time. Gossip is one of the most common “normal” behaviors that quietly wrecks trust. Most people don’t think they’re gossiping.They think they’re: Sometimes it is that. But a lot of the time it’s something else: cheap bonding at someone else’s expense. And it leaves … Read more

The “Good Times Friend” vs “Real Times Friend”

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One shows up for parties. The other shows up when it costs them something. Most people don’t lack friends. They lack reliable friends. And the easiest way to understand your social circle is this: There are Good Times Friends
and there are Real Times Friends. Both can be pleasant. Only one is dependable. 1) The Good … Read more

The Filipino Soft No Dictionary: What Filipinos Really Mean When They Say “Maybe”

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One of the most important lessons an American expat can learn in the Philippines is that “yes” doesn’t always mean yes. Understanding the Filipino Soft No can save you confusion, frustration, and hurt feelings.

The “Too Polite to Win” Rule (And the Asia Line Game)

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Polite is good. Passive is expensive. You ever notice how some people always get cut in line? At the grocery.At the airport gate.At the bank.At the clinic. And figuratively? In meetings.In family decisions.In business.In life. Same pattern every time: You wait like it’s a promise.They move like it’s a suggestion. That’s the “Too Polite to … Read more